"Nobody chooses dysfunction, conflict, pain.  Nobody chooses insanity.  This happens because there is not enough presence in you to dissolve the past...You are not fully here.  You have not quite woken up yet.  In the meantime, the conditioned mind is running your life....if you are one of those people who have an issue with their parents, if you still harbour resentment about something they did or did not do, then you still believe they had a choice--that they could have acted differently.  It always looks as if people had a choice, but that is an illusion.  As long as your mind with its conditioned patterns runs your life, as long as you are your mind, what choice do you have?  None.  You are not even there.  The mind-identified state is severely dysfunctional.  It is a form of insanity.  Almost everyone is suffering from this illness in varying degrees.  The moment you realise this, there can be no more resentment.  How can you resent someone's illness?  The only appropriate response is compassion."  (The Power of the NOW p 190.)